


Art of Understanding

by EmotionsofInk



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Angst, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Physical Abuse, Violence, Worlds 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:00:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22431481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmotionsofInk/pseuds/EmotionsofInk
Summary: All what he wanted to do was make sure he knew just how strong he made him. But the language barrier was making things a little difficult, as did the blood that was covering both of their hands.
Kudos: 21





	Art of Understanding

**Author's Note:**

> Oof it has been a long time since i have shared anything, I have been working on this ever since the start of worlds so it's slowly being put together. Just please note any Chinese that is spoken is written in italics (and I might have missed something so sorry about that).  
> Please note that this story does put someone from C9 in a pretty bad light, but it is not mentioned who it was, so that I guess is for you guys to decide. Well now I am rambling - on wards!

He wanted him to understand, he had seen how sad he looked, how defeated he was and it made him sad. He needed him to understand, he wouldn’t have been able to win it, it wasn’t for him he wouldn’t be this strong. The defeat at MSI had been the slap he needed, it drove him to do better and he had. But he wouldn’t have done better if it wasn’t for the defeat, he had been humbled, strengthened – unlocked. Maybe next time they met it would be the other way around, he had to make him understand everything.

He walked down the corridors after the win with all these thoughts running around in his head, the sound of his team-mate’s voices coming to him as nothing but background noise. Rookie didn’t know why he had a sudden need to talk to the TL midlaner, but it just wouldn’t leave him alone.

Mind made up he told his team he would be back later and headed off in the opposite direction in search of his wanted conversation partner. Rationally, the midlaner would be with his team, in the room that had been set aside for them, he had greeted them all in it before the match – but now it stared back at him empty. Having no idea where to go from here he turned to start randomly walking through the corridors when a sound caught his attention.

A crash, a cry of pain and a laugh all mixed in with yelled English that his brain could not comprehend. Any sane person would probably walk away from such horrid sounds, but the yelled English had an accent to it, an accent he knew belonged to the person who he was looking for. Determined, stubborn at his core, mind-set, he made his way towards the source of the yelling.

**\- - -**

Jensen’s head spun with pain, the backlash of being rammed hard into the wall, creeping up and down his neck and spine. The laugh echoed around his head, sounding like the crashing of the bombs as it taunted him, adding to the pain.

“You really are pathetic… all that talk about not being bothered and being all tough and look where it led you. Right back to me, right back to this.” He laughed again, as Jensen tried to push him off, he moved slightly before pushing him back, holding his wrists tightly above him. “Oh please, you’re completely at my mercy, nothing you can do about that.”

Jensen went to snap something back at this point, but was his words were cuff off into a gasp, as he was punched in the gut, the wind being completely knocked out of him. He would have fallen to his knees, if it wasn’t for the firm, painful grip on his wrists.

“What did you think changing teams would magically fix everything, you think just because you have managed to hide and run away from me for almost a whole year I was just going to let you be… oh no, the fun has been in the chase, the fun has been in knowing exactly when to strike.”

All through this monologue Jensen had been pulling and twisting his way out of the grip, trying his best to get free, one wrist free he twisted, kicking up with his knee. This movement caused the grip on his other wrist to loosen, sensing the small moment, he surged forward, becoming free from the whole grip for small moment. That small moment was gone when his right wrist was pulled, this time he was pushed into the wall face first, he felt something snap in his wrist as it was rammed into the wall.

“I guess now that you’re not on a team I care about, I won’t be needed to go easy on you – plus I have so… so much time to catch up on.” He put even more pressure on his wrist, “You certainly won’t be needing this, right…”

For the first time, a true sense of fear overcome any of the pain. “No, anything but… you can’t…”

“Oh, as if they would want you back after such a performance.”

The next thing Jensen knew there was a feeling of cold metal against his skin at his wrist and even through knowing and hating how much power it gave over he couldn’t help but scream.

**\- - -**

The sounds of yelling had stopped and Rookie paused, wondering if he had been going the right way, or even if he had imagined the whole thing. After all, no one else had come running in concern, no one else seemed worried or concerned as he passed by. He stopped, looking this way and that, wondering where to go next when a noise reached him that cut him right to the core.

The scream was one of pain, one of fear and without thinking too much about it, he ran straight towards the sound of it, falling through the door in his haste to open it and help in any way he could.

_“What is going on here!”_ He was met with the sight of the TL midlaner pressed up against the wall, a pained and shocked look on his face. The person holding him looked familiar, but not enough to place, especially with the dark look and smirk on his face.

“My, my what do we have here – do you want to join in on the fun? Or do you think we can be some kind of hero?” 

Jensen, sensing the tone in the voice, felt his stomach drop. He couldn’t let anyone get hurt because of him, because of this, “Leave him alone, don’t even think about hurting him… Rookie?”

Rookie had begun to step forward, “Why are you hurting him – you need to stop this, I…” He froze as Jensen was pushed against the wall again, falling to the ground afterwards. He went to walk over to him and help but was stopped as the attacker stepped forward, right in front of him. _“Get out of my way!”_ Standing to his full height, Rookie placed a glare on his face.

“Oooo, looks like I made him angry – apparently he only liked beating you up in video games.” He smirked again, holding his hands up in surrender before moving away from them, “I guess I will just leave you two love birds alone.” He closed the door, and the distinctive sound of it being locked echoed around the small space.

“Fuck,” Jensen breathed out, both in pain and the idea of being stuck in here. The pain jolted through his whole body as he tried to get back to his feet, he clutched his bleeding arm to his chest, holding back tears as his vision swarmed. “I can’t believe I let him have so much power over… oh.” He blinked as Rookie was suddenly on his knees beside him, carefully holding his injury.

“I’m sorry, I am so sorry that you have to I…” Jensen closed his eyes and tried to remember the word, “I’m… sorry…”

Rookie gave him an odd look as he pulled his jacket off and began to wipe away the blood that was soaking his skin. _“No, he should be the one apologizing, you shouldn’t….”_ He shook his head, “No.” Luckily the injury wasn’t too deep, although it was bleeding profusely, pressing down with his jacket didn’t seem to do anything, except maybe cause more pain to the TL midlaner.

A string of curse words left Rookie’s mouth as he began ripping the jacket into strips, trying his best to wrap the wound off, tightly tying it to try to stop the blood flow. This was done in complete silence because even though Jensen wanted nothing more to tell Rookie he wasn’t worth it; the language barrier was there. When he was done, Rookie indicated that he should try to see if he could move it.

Nicolaj smiled as he did so, the shooting pain had lessened. “Thank you, you didn’t have to – you could have just run, or ignored me or even…” He sighed as Rookie narrowed his eyes at him, frustrated that he couldn’t say anything.

Granted maybe it was also a good thing because now that the pain was gone and the immediate danger was over all he wanted to was cry and scream about what had just happened. He flinched slightly when his fellow midlaner reached out and brushed away the tears that were already beginning to drip down his face. 

“I thought… I thought I had gotten rid of him, I thought changing teams, changing the way I play… it felt so good to be through with him and now… now he might have just ruined my career.”

Rookie didn’t fully understand what he had saying but there were a few things that he picked up, he could summarize what he had been said. There was nothing he could say back however, as much as we wanted to, as much as he wanted to make him feel even the slightest bit better about the situation.

So, he did something that he would never admit to anyone, that his team wouldn’t even believe if it was mentioned. He grabbed Jensen up in a tight hug and let him cry on his shoulder. Rookie’s quiet had gone from wanting to tell Jensen that everything was going to be okay to wanting to make sure the rest of his team knew exactly what was going on. And maybe finding the person who had done this and punch them in the face, yup – that too.

After a few moments of crying, the tears stopped and Nicolaj pulled out of the hug, turning red with embarrassment, he thanked Rookie again who just nodded and got to his feet, checking for his open peace of mind that the door was actually locked.

It was and he sighed, banging his head against the all as he did so. He cheeked his jacket pockets for his phone, but found it empty, it was probably in his bag back with his team. Turning, he showed Jensen his empty pockets, hoping he would get the idea. The cringe of his face showed him more than anything he could be told.

“Mine wouldn’t be much help.” He shuffled over to the side of the room and picked up his phone, the cracked and broken screen shifting under his touch. “He smashed it when I tried to call my team for help…. I wonder if the call even went through.” He sighed, showing the broken phone to Rookie who frowned, “Looks like your stuck with me here, sorry about that.”

_“Well, I am glad that I am with you at least, otherwise you might have been in even more trouble.”_

Rookie stared down at his own hands, the blood transferred from the wound was still slick on his hands. They were stuck together, but they couldn’t stay here too long, even though Rookie had stopped the bleeding, the longer they waited, the more dangerous the wound got. 

Stuck going through his own thoughts, Rookie didn’t even realize that Nicolaj had taken off his own jacket, ripping that up too and attempting to wipe the blood off Rookie’s hand all awhile still one-handed. When he noticed this, the IG midlaner took it off him to finish it up, then moving on to remove any excess blood on Nicolaj himself.

Seeing the injury without his jacket showed how bad it really was, all up and down his arm was bruised and his bone looked twisted in a way that was unnatural and probably broken. He was amazed that Jensen wasn’t constantly screaming. 

“Pain?” He asked, hoping the single word would get through his whole meaning.

Nicolaj nodded, “I guess I am just used to it.” Nicolaj was giving him what he had dubbed as his “English is stupid and I am trying to understand it” look. Jensen had a feeling his accent wasn’t helping any either, he tried his best to understand his language lessons.

“uh… Not… not first… time… so.” He shrugged, hoping this would give the indication. Rookie suddenly looked angry and Nicolaj took this as him understanding.

“L… Liquid?”

“No… No!” Nicolaj cringed at how loud this was. He didn’t want him to think anyone at the team did this to him. Not anyone on his current team anyway. _“Past… last…. Year.”_ Nicolaj’s Chinese was horrible, he made a promise then and there to practice. Even if it was to thank Rookie properly.

The IG midlaner looked thoughtful. “They… know?”

Nicolaj laughed, “No… only you.”

“Should…. Should tell.”

“Not like I can hide it from them now anyway,” Nicolaj muttered more to himself than in hopes of Rookie understanding him. Sighing as he learned back into the wall, “They care too much.”

Rookie joined Nicolaj in learning against the wall, letting him lean on his shoulder. _“I will make sure they know, I will tell them, they care about you – about each other – they should know.”_

Nicolaj just made a humming sound at this and closed his eye, his breaths becoming heavy, his face scrunching up in pain. Even though he was used to it, it still hurt, it still made him want to cry. After a few painful, quiet moments Nicolaj fell asleep.

Rookie carefully lay him down on the ground as he got up quietly, returning to the door – there must be something that he could do to get them out of here.

**\- - -**

“Wait, hold on – aren’t we missing someone?” Jake’s comment, at first, caused confusion for everyone, before realization hit them all.

“Wait, he was right behind me?” Peter turned around in confusion, a small from on his face, “What is the bet he is mopping about somewhere blaming himself.”

“But we told him multiple times that it’s not true.”

Peter just shrugged at Core’s comment, “Doesn’t mean he believed it – or was listening. Hang on, let me call him… huh.” Upon retrieving his phone from his pocket, Peter found flashing up at him numerous miss calls from the missing midlaner. “He called me, a lot.”

“Jensen’s phone does have that auto-redial feature, he can just put it on speaker and let it continuously call.”

“Yeah but why would he need to call me that bad.” Looking through the messages and call he hummed, “There’s a message – a pretty long one.” He waited for a bit listening to it. “I think, he might have called me accidently it’s all static and just buzzing noise.”

“You can’t put that feature on by accident, surely it was something important, are you sure there isn’t a message – maybe you need to put the volume up.”

Peter rolled his eyes at Jake, “Yes – I’ve got the volume up, here.” He pulled the phone away from his ear and put it on speaker phone, the quiet, shifting sound came through. “See it’s nothing just noise and…!”

Peter almost dropped the phone in shock as a scream, easily recognized as their team-mates echoed through the phone. The team all yelled at once, talking quickly and moving forward, closer to the phone.

“Guys, shut up I can’t hear anything…” Peter placed his phone in a position where they could all here and pushed the volume up all the way up. The first sounds of voices came through cracking with the static.

“Oh come on now, I barely touched it… but I guess, yeah oh dear, I guess that is quite a large amount of blood.”

“Screw you, what…. What right do you…”

“My right? I own you, I thought we’d already established that or do you need a reminder.”

The sound of muffled yells and the thumping of bodies hitting a wall cracked through the phone, then silence, then, it stopped. The message ended with a beep, having reached the maximum time. The team stared, horrified at what they had just heard, then all at once, they began talking in panicked voices.

“Call him back quick, what are you waiting for!”

“When was it left, how long ago…”

“It’s not going through; it’s saying it has been disconnected.”

“Of course, it is, his phone probably died after you didn’t answer.”

“Oh yes, make me feel ten times worse about this.”

“It’s probably more damaged, I mean, maybe that’s why the sound quality is bad.”

“True, if I was attacking someone and saw they had their phone out I would probably destroy it to… fuck, fuck no… why the hell are we just standing here? We have to do something!”

“Like what, exactly, if you any amazing ideas, I would love to hear them.”

Silence fell on the group, fear, unknowing. 

“Let us retrace our steps, when did we see him last?”

“How about we go enquire with security?”

“Great idea,” Jake somehow not completely panicking like the rest, nodded towards his coach. “That is a great idea, why don’t we split up – you should go and do that and we will retrace our steps and maybe ask around.”

“Yes, we’ll call with any information.”

“Okay, guys let’s all just take a deep breath, we’re no use to him panicking like this.”

There was an echoing of nervous deep breaths at this as they split off, quick on their feet, uncertain, determined to find and help their missing friend.

**\- - -**

Rookie vaguely wondered what the time was and how long they had been stuck here for. It felt like hours but for Jensen’s sake he hoped it hadn’t been that long. The TL midlaner was still in a fitful sleep, Rookie had moved him so that now they both sat close to the door, Jensen head on his lap.

One hand was placed on the shoulder to stop him from moving painfully onto his injured side the other was flat on the door, that he banged every now and then. Hoping someone would catch the noise, Rookie had also shifted multiple pieces of fabric, paper and anything thin he could find under the bottom of the door. He hoped someone would notice the pile in front of the door and stop to investigate.

With a deep sigh he leaned back onto the wall and found himself talking to himself to fill the silence, that had engulfed the small space. _“All I wanted to do was find you and make sure you knew I only did so well because you destroyed us at MSI. I wanted to become stronger, I wanted to do better and even more than that, I was holding a grudge. When we were in the same group, I was happy because it gave me the chance to beat you, I wanted to…. None of that seems to matter now, nothing but getting you back to your team.”_

The silence fell on them again and Rookie leaned back, closing his eyes, a tiredness over coming him.

_“I will make sure they know what happened, I have to.”_

The exhaustion hit him at this and he yawned deeply, trying to force his eyes back open. Jensen twitched in his arms and let out a small whimper of pain – causing his eyes to immediately shoot open. Looking down he noticed that Jensen had somehow gripped his own injured arm in his sleep, putting pressure on the deep, dark bruises. Rookie figured he was having some kind of dream or memory about it and was holding it in an attempt to protect it.

He had to wake him, he had to make sure he didn’t hurt anymore. “Jensen?” He lightly shook the midlaner, careful not to touch any of the injuries. Placing one hand on his forehead he wiped away the wisps of hair and concentrated on the English words. “Nicolaj… wake up, please?”

He didn’t know if it was the English, his name or the softness of his touch but Jensen’s eyes blinked open, tear-filled and confused. He looked here and there for a moment before his eyes fell on the IG midlaner.

“What… Rookie… I thought, I was scared it might have been a dream, something I had just made up in my head.”

Even in understanding only a little, the frantic, the confusion, the tears told him all the needed to know. Carefully, Rookie placed a reassuring hand on Jensen’s. “Safe.” He nodded, hoping the message would get across. “Safe… with me.”

Jensen breathed out deeply at this, nodding and letting the calmness take him, _“Thank you.”_ He said trying to get himself into a sitting position. Rookie helped him move without aggravating the injury and the two sat side by side. 

A small quiet moment should between them before Rookie began banging his hand on the door again. It seemed pointless at this stage but he would not give up. Nicolaj just watched, content that Rookie was still holding onto his hand with the one he wasn’t banging on the door. Content to know that he wasn’t alone.

But then, muffled through the door, a different voice reached them, numerous voices – talking quickly. Rookie suddenly jumped to his feet, letting go of Jensen’s hand to be able to knock loudly. The muffled voices became clearer as they moved towards the door some words now even distinctive. 

“What the hell is all this on the ground by the door, wait what was that?”

Rookie rammed onto the door harder, yelling as loudly as he could, beside him, Nicolaj stumbled to his feet not wanting to jump to conclusions, but he pretty sure he recognized the voice. “I think that sounds like… I think it’s Peter.”

Rookie looked confused for a moment, “team?”

Jensen nodded answering with the actual gaming name so it would come across, “Doublelift.”

Rookie nodded, ramming his hands harshly on the door and yelling as loud as he could.

“Help! Doublelift help! With… with Jensen!”

It was barley a few seconds afterwards that the door swung open.

**\- - -**

They had made their way to the corridor where they had remembered seeing Jensen last, at a slight lose to know what to do at this point, they all began moving around, hoping some kind of clue would just jump out at them for where to go next.

“Wait, what about this?” The question came from Impact, who had leaned against a curtain thinking it was a wall, only to find out it was a hallway. He pulled the curtain across, revealing the long hallway.

“Oh, it’s the stock and movement hallway, like the one we have at the LCS.”

“Wait, we have something like this back home?”

“Yeah,” Jake nodded, pulling out his phone and sending the information regarding the hallway off to their coaching staff. Hopefully, the camera spotted something. “It’s too more things around unseen and to make the actual hallways less cluttered and such.”

“Huh, guess they’re doing their job if we haven’t noticed.”

“Guess so, this looks like our best bet however.” Ever the one with the cool head, Jake made his way forward, into the corridor, the others following him. “I hope we find something soon; I didn’t like the sound of that whole bleeding thing.” His phone beeped and he quickly checked it. “Ah, yes, they confirmed he was pulled into here – there is no footage of him leaving so he has to be in one of these rooms.”

“Are there no cameras down here?”

“Not ones that are working no.”

“Ah how… convenient for the person that did this.”

“Yes, I agree Core – that can’t be a coincidence.” The strove forward, quicker at this, now with more purpose of knowing they we’re going in the right direction. “This has to be it we have to be… hang on….” Peter moved forward confusion filtering through him. “What the hell is that, all on the ground, near that door?”

“Is that blood?” The wall beside them echoed slightly, causing Impact to jump. “Wait… what?”

More sounds, like someone was knocking on a door, “It’s coming from that door – the key’s in it.”

Yelled Chinese came to them, but filtered through a few simple English words. 

“Help Doublelift… with Jensen!”

That was all he needed to hear before Peter, the team right behind him, surged forward, turning the key and throwing the door open. In their haste they almost face planted, although managed to keep their footing quick enough to stop from falling into the person in the room.

“Jensen, are you in here – we heard you and…” Peter’s voice trailed off at the sight in front of them, “Nicolaj?”

They took in the sight, the frazzled looking Jensen, the make shift sling, stained fabric wrapped around the nasty looking wound. Rookie stood beside him, holding him up, a hard look on the IG’s face, as if preparing to protect Jensen from them if needed.

“Peter… guys…” Jensen’s tearful response, broke the freeze on the room. His body began shaking, “How, how did you…”

“You left a message on my phone, we didn’t like what we heard, come here you.” Peter pulled the shaking Jensen into a hug, taking care to not put any pressure on the injured arm. Even so, Jensen couldn’t help but flinch at the contact. “I’m so sorry I didn’t answer, so, so sorry it’s taken us this long to get here.”

“It’s okay, it’s... I’m okay.” Really, he wasn’t okay – not even close to it, but he was better, now that his tea was here. “Besides, I haven’t been alone, so it hasn’t been too bad.”

At this Peter pulled out of the hug, turning his attention to Rookie, the IG midlaner had finally let his guard down. “I don’t have the words… to even thank you enough, how did you…”

Rookie was eyeing him strangely, _“I need to talk to someone, in your team – that can understand…”_

“Yes, of course.”

Rookie nodded at this and went to them to address Jensen, who was now locked in a hug with Core, “Tell them.”

Jensen turned to the side at this, nodding to the midlaner, who had, under no uncertain terms, saved his life. “I will… I don’t know… thank you.”

“Good, ah… out.”

“Yeah, let’s get you both out of here, we can talk once you’ve seen a Doctor and rested.” Jake commented, giving Jensen a look. “As much as I would love to go after the person that did this to you, safety first.”

There was nodding and numerous agreements from everyone around them and they left the room, together. Jensen couldn’t help but let some tears slip down from his eyes, falling down his face. He had almost given up on ever seeing them again, on ever leaving this room, and now – he was free.

**\- - -**

‘Someone he knows did this to him?”

“Someone from last year, so yes, probably someone we know.”

They sat in shocked silence in the waiting room, the team and coaching staff now all having been caught up from Rookie, through the rest of IG and hurried conversation of mixed and broken English and Mandarin.

“Someone on Cloud9,” Impact asked in shock, horrified at the thought. “Someone I played with.”

“He wasn’t specific on team or coaching staff but, Rookie did vaguely recognize him so… still either way it’s inexcusable.” 

The silence fell on them all once more, “Do we have any updates on the injuries other than the obvious through what we saw.”

“No, technically we’re not allowed the information,” Peter sighed wringing his hands together. “They have to wait for Jensen to wake up and give consent for us to know.”

“Do you think he will?”

“I think Rookie had convinced him he needs to let us know what happened…” Peter breathed out deeply, “I keep, I keep thinking what would have happened if I had picked up… what would have happened if Rookie didn’t find him… how long..”

“We can’t think of what if’s, we just need to be thankful that Rookie was wanting to talk to Jensen in the first place, don’t dwell on what could have been, it gets way to emotional.”

“Yeah,” Jake interjected, “And I think we’re all done enough crying at this point… what do we do though, if he doesn’t tell us.”

“Last resort, get the message on Peter’s phone cleared up, pinpoint the voice or get the security footage. See if we can figure out who went into that corridor.”

“Police are already doing that I believe, assault and all that.”

“Hmm…”

The silence fell again, all of them lost in thoughts and fears. After what seemed like a life time, the door to the room opened and a doctor made his way into the room. Offering them all a small smile as they all stood as he entered.

“Good evening, are you all here for Mister Nicolaj Jensen?”

“Yes, has he woken?”

“Briefly, he still in quite a frail state, losing that much blood will do that to you.” The Doctor paused before continuing, “But he was awake long enough for me to ask consent questions and he is happy you knowing what is happening.”

“Well… how… how bad is it?”

“The main injury, the cut through his wrist, tore ligaments and muscles and the ensuing attack after that has caused the wrist bones to snap, in numerous places.”

“Is that, ah… can that be healed?”

“Not fully, no, the bone will mend and the muscles will grow but he will not regain full use of his right wrist and numerous muscles and movements on the hand.”

“Fuck… that bastard has ruined his… his whole…” Impact could barely get the sentence out. His voice turning into a growl, his whole body shaking. “Guess he didn’t care about doing lasting damage now he is on a different team.”

“Is there anything else Doctor?”

“There was slight bruising across the neck, although seeming it only came through with some infra-red and x-ray, I am positive it’s an older injury. Speaking of older injuries, there were a few smaller breaks that have healed or deep bruising, dating back to a few years at least.”

“Damn it, it just keeps getting worse, how could the organization let this happen.” Jake growled out the words hitting the couch he was standing by in frustration. “It makes me sick all of this going on and everyone has been at his damn throat for changing teams…” He shook his head, breathing out, trying to regain his anger. “If this isn’t a reason, I don’t know what is.”

“He was very persistent,” Steve commented, looking thoughtful. “Not that I needed, much convincing but I do recall him saying it was us or nothing… I don’t think he could have had another year there.”

“Just so you are aware all of this information has been handed off to the police and they will probably want to talk to Mister Jensen at some point. But for now,” He sighed, looking tired, “Would you like to see him, he is still sleeping but I am sure he would appreciate friends being in his room when he wakes.”

“Yes, please take us to see him.”

They all followed him out one door and into another a spacious room awaited them, with enough chairs and couches for them all to sit. Jensen slept on the bed, his injured wrist and arm placed on top of the covers, resting across his body. The spider-like bandages showing the dark bruises underneath. His normal pale skin was splotched and brushed with purple and red, the deep marks creating patterns on his skin. He looked worse than when they had last seen him, then again, last time they weren’t really looking for that. More, glad he was just there.

“Fucking hell,” Peter muttered trying to stop the tears in his eyes, “It’s wrong, so… so wrong.” He turned away at this, shocked at how much just seeing him like this was affecting. He couldn’t stop thinking that someone they knew had done this, that they thought they had the right to do this.

“Why do you think, he never said anything?” Core asked the question, sitting down right at Jensen’s bedside, quickly pushing out his hand and brushing aside his hair. “Maybe, maybe he doesn’t trust us.”

“No, it won’t be that… my guess is that, it was emotional too… and depending on who it is, maybe he already told someone and they just didn’t care.” Jake joined Core at the bedside, “The fact he called Peter and that he gave consent of us knowing, tells us that it is not about him not trusting us.”

“If they knew,” Impact was shaking, “If, if the so-called friends on that team knew… I’m going... I’m going to be so…” His sentence trailed off into an angry mutter of Korean as he sat down on one of the couches at the side. He didn’t want to crowd him and besides Impact didn’t know if he could stop himself from taking Jensen’s injured hand.

Slowly, one by one, they all took a seat – all what was left to do know, was wait.

**\- - -**

_“This is all translated?”_

Rookie stared at the piece of paper in his hand, the top, his own writing, the characters flowing and linked together. Under it, English, words to could barely pronounce and understand, let alone read.

_“Thank you very much for doing this for me.”_

_“Please, it was my pleasure, there were some words and phrases I had to take liberties with but overall it was a pretty easy translation. You… You must really want him to know this.”_

_“Now, more than ever, when there are people trying hard to bring him down, he has to know that he helped me rise up and that I believe he will do so as well.”_

He slipped the piece of paper insider the card that his whole team had signed and sealed it quickly. Showing his thanks one last time for the translation he nodded before making his way out of the hotel and onto the streets. Rookie only had a few days before he and his team headed off to participate in quarters. Rookie wanted to have a proper goodbye with his fellow midlaner, and to see with his own eyes that he was actually okay.

The trip to the hospital was an apprehensive one and when he got there, he found himself frustrated once again with the language barrier as he tried to find his way up to the room. It seemed like a life time, but eventually Rookie found himself outside of Jensen’s hospital room, knocking hesitantly.

It was answered by a very confused Impact, “Ah – hello.”

“Ah… awake?”

Impact shock his head and motioned for Rookie to come in, he did so, sheepishly making his way into the room – taking in the environment as he did so. Seeing all these people that were so close to Jensen, he felt somewhat out of place.

He felt almost like he didn’t belong, but with the team’s insistence he found himself, sitting with the TL coaching staff, able to have at least a small conversation with them.

_“His wrist is broken?”_

_“Yeah, and even more than that… it… it doesn’t look good for his career.”_

_“No… how dare someone take that from him. Do you know who yet?”_

_“No, we’re hoping he tells us when he wakes up.”_

_“I’m sorry, I didn’t recognize him too much and can’t tell you anything that helps.”_

_“You saved his life; you have nothing to be sorry about.”_

Rookie just hummed at this, returning his gaze towards the bed where Jensen lay. Something snapped in him, something cried out in pain. He wanted him to be okay, he didn’t want this to define his life. After all that time spent with Jensen, Rookie kind of felt a kind of pull towards him now, all he wanted was to tell him he was strong and that everything was going to be okay.

It was unfair, that saying that, would be a lie.

**\- - -**

His body felt heavy, his muscles strained to work, his eyes clouded and strained to open. In the back of his mind a little voice told him it would be so much easier if he didn’t open his eyes, if he just sat here and let the world engulf him. A small part of him wanted to listen to that voice but an even larger part refused. He wanted to see his friends again, he wanted to love his life, even if it wold look drastically different now.

Everything else had been taken from him, his pride, his tears, his career, but he would not let his will to live be taken away. No, that was something he grasped onto with both hands, held onto tight and refused to let go. 

“Wait, wait I think he’s waking up… Jensen, Nicolaj? Can you hear me? Can you open your eyes…?”

“I’m, I’m trying… I am trying.” Talking was tiring but he wanted to make sure they knew he was okay, that he was trying. “But it hurts, it hurts so, so much.”

Jensen breathed out deeply, trying to pull the pain away but he couldn’t seem to be able to. Then, a soft hand on his forehead, the calming brushing of fingers through his hair.

“I am right here, I have you.”

His head had stopped spinning long enough for him to recognize the voice, “Core?”

“We are all here, just take your time.”

Hearing the voice gave him strength, it made it all seem easier. Mustering up his strength, Jensen opened his eyes, blinking at the harsh lights before his vision focused on the body beside him. Core smiled happily, his hand still calmly on Jensen’s forehead. Jake just offered a smile, waving slightly.

“Hey you. we are all here, we just didn’t want to crowd you.”

Jensen hummed, shifting in the bed to look past them, the couches in the room were filled with the rest of the team, the coaching staff and a very relieved looking Rookie. When the IG midlaner caught his eyes, he smiled and gave him a thumbs up.

“Wow, aren’t I Mister popular all of a sudden.”

“Hey, are we not allowed to just be worried about you.” Peter said from his position on a chair in the corner of the room. He picked up the chair and moved it a bit, sitting down at the foot of the bed. “You scared us, we just want to be with you, make sure you had someone when you woke, someone to talk to.”

“Mmm…” Jensen shuffled and with the help of Jake and Core, managed to get himself into a sitting position. “I don’t think there is much to talk about, unless you want me to wallow in self-pity about my career being…” He sighed, shaking his head as he looked down at his injured arm. “Did the Doctor tell you?”

“Yeah, we know all of it… Nicolaj, we can’t say how sorry we are but rest assured we will be with you every step of the way.”

“You don’t have to apologize; you weren’t the ones that did this – you would never do this.”

“Well then, who did do this to you?”

“I can’t…”

“Jensen, the police have already started an investigation. They are going to find out, which means eventually we will find out.” It was Steve that voiced this, walking forward as he did so, “But we would rather hear it from you, please?”

“Police huh, looks like I am going to ruin his life.”

“It’s no less than what he deserves… You don’t need to protect him – he doesn’t get to have that protection from you.”

Jensen took a deep breath, trying to reign in some of the panic that was over-taking him. “No one else believed me, you know, when it first happened – when I asked for help, no one took it seriously.” He looked up at this, searching their faces as if expecting to see the same denial from them. All he saw however, was anger, was pain that mirrored his own, was acceptance and the want to help, the want to make sure that he was alright.

“We are not turning out backs on you – please trust us.”

There was a silence at this, no one dared speak before Jensen did, before he could sort everything in his mind. As the attention crackled, Jensen wrestled with his thoughts, wrestled with the little voice, (which he now realized sounded a lot like him) telling him they wouldn’t care. 

But they were right, he had been protecting him for far too long.

“I…”

**\- - -**

Talking had tired him out, exhaustion had overtaken him and the team as they had talked through everything. Shock, horror and anger were all rolling through the room. When Jensen opened his eyes for the second time, only one person was in the room with him, the IG midlaner.

Rookie offered him a small smile and then a glass of water, when Jensen made a face at drinking it, Rookie shock his head, “Doctor.”

Sighing, Jensen took it and slowly sipped the water, his throat was dry and constricted and the liquid hit it hurt. After the whole cup had been consumed, Rookie seemed satisfied, taking the cup and letting Jensen snuggle back into the blankets. He began tracing his fingers along the bandages of his arm before moving his attention to the room, noticing the empty chairs and the lack of his team.

“Food,” Rookie told him, taking his hand to stop him from placing any pressure on the injury, “Angry.”

“Yeah, they were pretty angry I would say,” He offered Rookie a small smile, “You are here still through, I have got that still.” Jensen sighed, “you, you will be leaving soon however, I imagine, for worlds…”

Rookie looked thoughtful for a moment, trying to figure out what was being said with the few words that he understood. He nodded in the end, replying simply, “Tomorrow.”

“Oh,” Jensen breathed out deeply, “Well, I think I am going to miss you,” He linked his fingers individually with the IG midlaners, looking down at it, the injury standing out, “Mister Life-saver that you are.”

Rookie just smiled at this, shuffling awkwardly in his chair, “See you, next year… stronger.”

“Ha! Not with this,” Jensen tried to move his arm but to no avail, “I don’t think I will be playing with this anytime soon… I’m not strong…”

Rookie pursed his lips, “You don’t deserve to have your career ruined like this, he should be the one that doesn’t get to play, he should be the one without any strength… he doesn’t deserve yours…” Rookie’s eyes turned dark and Jensen watched as he ranted in Chinese, seeming to get more and more frustrated as time went on. 

In the end, Rookie huffed, looking away as if embarrassed before turning back to Jensen, “unfair.”

“Yeah, but less so now that… oh.” Jensen blinked as Rookie held out a card to him. “For me?”

“Read… please?”

Jensen nodded, opening the cards envelope and pulling it out, it was signed by all of the IG team and staff and a large note, separate from the card fell out. Jensen frowned, before picking it up, unfolding it to reveal the Chinese and the English translation underneath it.

“I just wanted to let you know, that I was actually looking for you to just talk, which was one of the reasons I was able to find you. You were sad about the result of the game and I could tell that you were angry at how you played and I wanted to cheer you up. You need to know that I am stronger because of the defeat from MSI, I had been too sure of myself and underestimated my opponent. But you showed me that I needed to do better, in turn, I was only able to beat you here because of it. I hope, that the next time we met, it will be the over way around and you will once again be stronger than me. I don’t think that this injury will stop you, you are too stubborn to let that happen. Although I am sad what happened and how it happened, I am glad I got to spend some time with you, to know you a little better, and to be able to call you friend.”

Jensen found himself speechless at the end, not at all surprised to find tears, welling in his eyes. He had no idea what the IG midlaner had thought so much of him, especially his MSI performance. When he looked up and over at Rookie the midlaner looked back slightly embarrassed.

Rookie cleared his throat and nodded, “a… friend?”

“Yeah…” Jensen, quicker that both of them thought possible, taking Rookie by surprise, moved over to the side of the bed, twisting to pull him into a tight hug. _“Thank you.”_

Rookie just hummed, sinking into the hug, letting the moment just be between the two of them. A splintered break in what was happening and the ensuing storm of uncertainty that was to come.

**\- - -**

“Okay, careful… careful.”

“Peter, I am not that fragile you know.”

“Shush, now just hold that there and… good.”

Jensen just rolled his eyes as Peter sat down next to him, making sure not to even touch the injured arm that was laying across the pillow on his lap. “You know there is a thing as being too careful, you can’t protect me like this forever.”

“Just watch me, now shut up and take your meds.” The ACD glared, pouring a glass of water for him and handing over the pain killers that Jensen had been taking for the past week.

They were finally back home in LA and the team had insisted that he moved back into the team apartments while he was recovering. He had been outnumbered, plus it was pretty hard to argue with his team when they got their stubborn. 

“Are you…” Jensen sighed, “Are you angry at me?”

“Angry?”

“You all have just… been different since you found out…” Jensen’s words were quiet. He had been worried about this, it felt like his team was short with him, frustrated, he found conversations were harder to have and he could feel a kind of coolness coming from them, a tension. “I know you must be angry at me for not letting you know any of what was going on…”

“No… no, I’m angry at the bastard that did it, I’m angry at those that have brushed it aside. I am angry at myself for not being trusting enough for you to tell me…” Peter sighed, putting a hand on Jensen’s shoulder. “We are not angry we’re sad, that you didn’t think you could trust us… were angry that this has happened, but not angry at you.”

Jensen didn’t look convinced, “is that why you’re the only one that’s talked to me since I’ve got back?”

Peter flinched at this, sighing deeply he knew he would have to choose his next words very, very carefully. “They… are all just trying to figure some things out.”

“What and you don’t?”

“I’m… I’m figuring them out by talking to you… everyone else.” Peter sighed, he knew it would be better to just tell him, rather than let Jensen think they all hate them. “Look, Impact is furious with himself because it was happening while he was still on the team, so he’s trying to come up with a way to apologize… Core won’t talk to anyone here but Cain said he heard him talking to who we assume is Crown and we have a horrid feeling maybe something similar happening back in Korea. Steve and Cain are on war paths with lawyers and the association and are ready for blood and Jake…”

There was a small pause and Jensen sighed, “Jakes leaving.”

“Yeah but don’t for one second think it has anything to do with this. This has been talked about ever since MIS, you know this…”

“Yeah, it’s just… so hard to not blame myself somehow, why is he leaving when I just could… it’s not like I am any use to anyone at this point.”

“You’re not going anywhere; this is your home. You belong here,” Peter sounded absolutely appalled at the idea. “You are staying right here with people that care about you.”

Jensen sighed, shifting slightly on the couch, moving so that he was in a side hug with Peter, “you wouldn’t be the first to say that… hmm, but you’ll be the first to mean it.” A small silence engulfed they and it clung to them, looming and crackling before Jensen broke it. “I am sorry, I didn’t trust you with this, I was just… so scared.”

“I know, It’s okay… it’s okay.”

**January 1st 2020**

He gritted his teeth as the pen ran across the paper slowly, his whole arm protesting at the flowing motion. He bit his lip, holding up the paper to scrutinize the signature. It was certainly wobbly and broken but it was the best he could do. His eyes flickered over the court document, once again and he breathed out deeply, trying to stop the emotion.

To late however, tears began trickling at his eyes, he couldn’t believe that after all this time, things were finally going to be settled, he wouldn’t have to live in fear of him again. 

“Hey birthday boy, why are you hiding out… Oh, sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“No, it’s fine,” Jensen wiped his eyes and turned, smiling at his former team-mate near the door. “Hey, you made it.”

“Of course, I did, you are my friend that doesn’t change.” Jake grinned, greeting Jensen with a hug, avoiding his right side as he did so. “Well, it looks better, I don’t know if that is saying much however.”

The large, bulky bandages were gone, replaced by a simple butterfly bandage and a half-sling that Jake helped Jensen get back into. “How does it feel?”

“More of a nuisance than anything. It’s hard to not just use it, because I can but I’m not supposed to. If I don’t rest it for the right time then it’s never going to heal…”

“But if you do, it will heal, right?”

“Yes, they said as long as I treat it right, it shouldn’t take more than a year to fully heal. I could be easily playing again by about September, so I hope to be back to it next year…. It will be nice going back to what I love without this all hanging over me.”

“I’m glad to hear that… you will be studying every game this year though; I have no doubt that.” 

Jensen laughed as they moved out into the party, “yeah, I’m a but addicted to this thing.”

Jake smile at this, gave him another side hug and a look that said more than any words could before heading off to greet other people. 

Jensen began the rounds, surging hello to everyone, sharing pleasantries which he hoped would be enough to please Peter who had be adamant they throw a party for him. He was hoping to turn in early as his pain-killer made him super exhausted and kind of irritable if he didn’t sleep enough.

“Why it is, that you look like you don’t want to be at your own party?” Jensen turned at the voice and was greeted by a shy smile. “Hi.”

“Ah, hi… you’re here…”

“Well, we’re team-mates now, it would be rude of me to not wish you a happy birthday.” He held out a hand to shake, quickly realizing his mistake, switching hands so that Jensen could use his uninjured hand. “So, happy birthday and all, and I’m… really glad that you are okay and I know words don’t mean, but I am sorry, to hear what you have been through.”

“Thank you,” There was a small silence, Jensen shifting awkwardly on his feet. “This, is not going to be awkward, is it?”

Eugene laughed, “Look, I know from the outside people are all going to try to make all these assumptions but I know why I am here, I know…. I am not here to replace you, not by a long shot. But I will be trying, showing that I am worth a place on a team… probably not this one though, you have got that one down.”

“Well,” Jensen grinned, “I will try to be the best coach you’ve ever seen, so that they will all be wanting to snapping you up in an instant.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Eugene bypassed the hand shake for this, actually hugging his fellow midlaner, adding softly. “You are so strong, to have gone through this, I admire that so much – I hope we can be… friendly, even friends in time.”

Jensen sighed softly while in the hug, “Me too, I would really like that.”

A small moment passed and they pulled out of the hug, Eugene then hitting him softly on the shoulder, causing Jensen to roll his eyes. He made a comment about not wanting to keep him and left with a smile, leaving Jensen standing awkwardly in the middle of the room.

He suddenly realized how many people there were here, and how many of them probably wanted to talk to him. Jensen felt his stomach drop, he really wasn’t up for that many conversations, especially with certain people, especially those that kept glancing at him with pity in their eyes. His breath caught in his throat and his feet were suddenly rooted to the ground, he wanted to get out but there didn’t seem to be a way to make that happen.

“You alright, Nicolaj?” The voice belonged to Steve as the team owner walked up behind him and placed a steady hand on Jensen’s shaking shoulder. “You look like you want to run away screaming.”

“There… there are too many people here… too many people that will want to talk, too many conversations that I am not ready to have.” Jensen shook his head and leaned into Steve as he gripped him tighter at the words. “I… I shouldn’t run away from my problems but… it’s just too much.”

“Okay, you just stay with me then, they can’t talk to you if I am talking to you.” There was a small smile, “I’ll just be here, until you are ready.”

“Really?”

“Of course, it’s what a real friend does.”

The emphasis on the word did not go unnoticed and Jensen nodded, leaning more into Steve as they made there way through the crowds, only really nodding to anyone that looked at them, some smiled were given to team-mates as they gave them a look of understand.”

“Steve?”

“Mm?”

“Thank you.”

“Hey, it’s your birthday, you shouldn’t have to run and hide or to feel overwhelmed.”

“Well, yes… but I meant for everything else… thank you.”

They stopped for a little bit and Steve just stared at Jensen, there was no need to clarify what he meant, no need to ask further. But he did wish that the midlaner didn’t feel like he had to thank him, he didn’t feel like he deserved such, but trying to argue with Jensen about this was not worth the effort on both of their parts.

“Anytime.”

They would get through this – somehow. All they needed to do was to stay together.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading - please let me know what you thought. I just wanted to ask as well, if this type of layout or a multi-chapter thing more is wanted for reading. :)
> 
> Happy new year everyone!


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